Giving Thanks – Days 5, 6, 7

  Day 5 – A Word I’m Thankful For

 

A word I am incredibly thankful for is…

 

Life.

 

It’s so precious.  It should be lived passionately, happily, and full of love.  Enjoy little things, make time for yourself and your loved ones, and laugh a LOT.  It should be loved.  Even through mistakes and hardships, we learn and we love.  And we live.

 

For a very long time, I didn’t want to live.  I didn’t know what I was, who I was, and I felt absolutely worthless and like I didn’t deserve life.   I wasn’t always suicidal, just most of the time I wanted to simply stop existing.  I felt everyone would be happier if I did.

 

Thanks to my twin flame, I want to live.

 

Live.  Not die.  It’s so precious to me now.  I cherish every single day that I have.

 

 

Day 6 – A Memory I’m Thankful For

 

I’m very thankful that I got to spend the last six months of my dad’s life with him.   He had been ill since a massive stroke half paralyzed him and took away most of his speech in 1997, and he was very, very ill and passed away in December of 2009.  I had had to return to the US during my immigration process to Canada, and it was a terrible eighteen months.  But on one of the few days he had without a ventilator during that terrible final week of his life, he was very coherent and he squeezed my hand and told me he loved me.

 

 

Just being able to say I loved him was so important to me, since we knew he wasn’t going to make it.   The old Dad came through, brown eyes twinkling like they had when I was a child before he had the stroke.   I felt forgiveness and love in his touch and the goodbye in his face.

 

He slipped into incoherent agony later that night, then he had to go back on life support as he slipped into a coma.    He died two or three nights later.

 

I will always be grateful for those last moments with him, where we were able to say a proper goodbye.  It was my consolation once he was gone, and it still is.  I know many people are never as lucky to tell their loved ones goodbye like that.

 

 

 

Day 7 – A Luxury I’m Thankful For

 

This is something I’ve been thankful for for many years.  Internet.

 

I think a lot of people take it for granted these days, but I’m thankful for it every day of my life.

 

When I was younger and extremely isolated, the internet was my sole window into the outside world.  It’s the only way I had friends.  I wouldn’t be in Canada without it, and I wouldn’t have the friends, the experiences, or the memories I now have.

 

Without internet, I wouldn’t be able to be in touch with my family all the time, with my more distant friends, or with my twin flame while we’re still across an ocean from each other.   Hell, I wouldn’t be writing this blog post right now! 🙂

 

Love and light,

Mary

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